This Changed Our Relationship
Talk With The Video
Summary
- I read "Mating in Captivity" and found it to be one of the best books on relationships. While there's some odd content in it that I don't endorse, it provided valuable insights on distance and closeness in relationships.
- The idea is that being too close to someone can make the relationship feel like siblings, reducing intimacy. On the other hand, being too far apart can lead to insecurity and uncertainty.
- The book gave us useful language for discussing our needs for space or closeness in a way that doesn't feel negative. We often joke about needing alone time, saying things like, "I'm sick of seeing your face," and then taking time apart.
- Sometimes, after being apart, we feel like we're dating again, with a renewed attraction and excitement to see each other. This language and framework have improved our relationship.
Video
How To Take Action
I would suggest implementing the strategy of balancing distance and closeness in your relationships, whether personal or professional. This means finding the sweet spot where you're not too close, to avoid that "sibling" feeling, and not too far, which can cause insecurity.
A good way of doing this is by setting aside time for yourself, even if it's just a few hours. You can jokingly communicate the need for space to make it light-hearted, like saying, "I need some me-time away from your face!" This can help you both feel comfortable taking a step back without any negative feelings.
In business or teamwork, this might look like encouraging solitary work sessions followed by group meetings. It helps to foster individual creativity and focus while also maintaining a strong team bond.
Also, use playful language to express when you miss closeness. It adds excitement when you do reconnect. Saying things like, "I feel like we're dating again because I haven't seen you much," can rekindle interest and attraction.
Implementing these strategies can lead to better understanding and improved dynamics in your relationships. It’s important to recognize when you need space or closeness and to communicate it openly. Maintain a balance, and you'll likely find your relationships growing stronger and more enjoyable.
